Friday, October 8, 2010

FML

This is the dumbest thing ever.

earlier this week i was eating grapes when all of the sudden my jaw hurt and it felt like there was an air bubble under the left side of my jaw where my glands are. I felt the gland it was really swollen. the next night i asked my sister (the nurse who thinks she knows everything) what it could be and she was very excited to tell me i have blocked salivary duct (OK she got one thing right). so basically every time i eat my submandibular salivary gland fills with saliva that cannot escape because i have a stone blocking the conduit between my gland and my mouth.



it's been 4 days and it hasn't gotten better. so yesterday i go to the doctor and she basically laughs at me and tells me i have to go home and suck on lemon drops or sour patch kids to help the stone pass. I hate her now.



I have eaten like 30 sour patch kids and 20 lemon drops and nothing has happened. When i eat it swells up so i look like this.



ok, it's not that bad...but that's what it feels like. is this karma? am i that lame of a person that this super lame thing happened to me? alright, i'm going to start being a better person.

4 comments:

Shannon said...

this is the second time in two weeks that I have heard that someone has been prescribed sour patch kids by a doctor. it's kinda awesome.

Shannon said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
alfa foxtrot said...

you're not lame you're fantastic! this is a rare condition, just like you! miss you xoxoxo

Laura said...

Update: I passed the stone! it was amazing. Saliva flooded my mouth with warm content.